Page 43

19337LP

and to maintain and care for the home. Problems arise in marriage when the husband or wife neglect their responsibilities. A husband who is lazy and fails to hold a steady job, or carelessly racks up unpaid bills, inevitably creates insecurity in his wife and problems in the marriage. A wife who leaves the house in a perpetual mess or who spends undue time chatting, pursing a hobby, shopping, or otherwise neglecting the home causes frustration for her husband and children. Problems also arise in marriage when either partner attempts to fill the other’s role. Some husbands try to dictate household procedures in a way that makes the wife feel her territory is invaded. A wife may try to control her husband, or take charge of his decisions in such things as financial management and family worship. This role-shifting produces long-term problems, because it leads to competition rather than working together. Many a child has testified as an adult to the struggle of honoring a father or mother who was out of place. Following are a few pointers: • Discuss responsibilities together. Ask each other to describe any areas of neglect. Listen. Ask each other for pointers in fulfilling personal responsibilities. • If you disagree with each other about responsibilities, arrange to talk together with a trusted Christian advisor about the problem. • Pray about your responsibilities. • If there has been a pattern of irresponsibility, start by improving one thing at a time. Make yourself accountable to someone for regular checkup and encouragement sessions. • Write out your commitment to your responsibilities. Be reasonable, but specific. • Where your partner is weak or neglectful, consider how you can be supportive without stepping into that responsibility. Make a list of suggestions. Snapshot From Life Dave and Janet had a shaky marriage from the start. Neither was truly a Christian when they were married, although they both had a religious background. Shortly into their marriage, Dave was unfaithful. Janet didn’t discover this until after they both became Christians and Loaves & Fishes • Issue 32 | 41


19337LP
To see the actual publication please follow the link above