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The P ublisher Po stulates BEYOND SERENITY Sometimes I don’t care if I can’t change things, but most of the time I want to be able to change them, even if I know I can’t. 24 TAMPA BAY MAGAZINE | JANUARY/FEBRUARY 2017 GRAM Publisher / Editor By Aaron R. Fodiman For most of my life, I have attempted to follow the advice of the Serenity Prayer to accept the things I cannot change and to change the things that I can, while pretending that I can tell one from the other. As life goes on, I am finding that there are fewer and fewer things I am able to change, other than myself. So I now spend most of my time examining myself to determine what I should change and what I should accept. I have learned that anger and revenge get me nowhere and that when someone does something displeasing, it makes no difference what the facts are. It is best to move forward without assigning blame or rethinking what could have been done to avoid the situation. As there is no sense in working to “put the cork back in the bottle” once all the liquid is gone. The wisdom I once relied upon to help me know what I could change and what I had to accept seems to have shifted from a position of me being the master of my own destiny to being a believer in fate and predestination in many areas. I credit much of this to laziness, since many times I perceive that the results that I could achieve would probably not be worth the effort. Fortunately, I am now much more willing to take responsibility for changing myself. I have come to realize that as much as I may complain about how hard it is to eat healthy, it isn’t that difficult if I really want to do it. Therefore, I am evaluating which of my many habits, choices or whatever you choose to call them, needs to be altered or eliminated. This is not an easy task, as I find that anything I honestly want to do, I can. Exercise, as distasteful as it is for me, is my choice, even though all I can think about when I hear the word exercise is “extra fries.” In the past, serenity has meant accepting that which I cannot change and trying to change that which I can control by being wise enough to be able to discern one from the other. However, since I am currently more disposed to believing that the only thing I have power over is myself, that’s the thing I’m trying to change. I should have figured that out a long time ago, but it takes awhile for me to get things right, especially since I always thought I knew what was right from the beginning. Are you still thinking you can change things that can’t be changed? I am not. 9


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