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���� �� decision-making. The first real-life story is that of Charlie, a young man who drank at a party, and then chose to give a friend a ride home. Charlie’s friend died in the ensuing crash. The workbook asks probing questions about the implications of this situation. Impairment influences judgment. Using research done by Columbia University, students find out that teens who use drugs are five times more likely to have sexual intercourse, and those who use alcohol are seven times more likely to have sex. A real-life story in this chapter of Aspire is about Shane, a young man who had a lonely summer after he dropped unhealthy friend relationships in order to get himself on a new path. Shane listened to a teacher and a coach who separately approached him to warn him that they believed he was “hanging around with the wrong crowd.” Two of the people Shane stopped socializing with were Charlie and the young man killed in a car crash whom the students had met earlier. The workbook says, “Walking away from his friends was very difficult to do and at times he questioned the wisdom of his decision. It wasn’t until years later, looking back, that Shane realized this was one of the most important decisions he ever made.” The student affirmation for this chapter is: I will exercise self-control and build my character. Marriage Rocks The sixth chapter of Aspire starts off by asking students to describe the kind of person they hope to marry. They are also asked to consider the qualities another person will see in them. The workbook says, “If you want to marry a caring, giving, loving person, you're probably going to have to be a caring, giving, loving person.” It continues, “Now is the time to become a person of character.” Students again hear from Shane, the young man from the previous chapter who broke away from former friends. The continuation of Shane’s story includes a young woman he met in college, Kelly. The couple has now been married for over twenty-two years; they have a great relationship and four children. Shane says, “Although we faced much pressure from friends and society in general, we were both able to save sex for marriage — and looking back we’re very glad that we did.” Aspire asks, “How do you think their decisions in high school and college have contributed to a healthy, lasting marriage and family life?” In the workbook, there’s a list of things couples can do together to help build a solid relationship, including talking about future goals and plans; keeping open communication; doing volunteer work together; spending time with each other’s family and friends; and setting and communicating clearly about physical boundaries. Aspire makes the point that although it is “commonly believed that cohabitation is a good way to prepare for marriage,” that isn’t how it plays out. In reality, after one year of living together only 30% of couples end up getting married. And for those couples who start out living together, their chances of getting divorced are 65% greater than for those who don’t live together before they marry. In the true story of Cori, students are told what really happens when sexual activity becomes part of an uncommitted relationship. Sexual activity precludes the development of the relationship in important ways. Cori had sex with her boyfriend, who became her fiancé, and then her husband. There were negative consequences to their premarital physical relationship “because we were focused on the physical.” Cori and her husband never got to know each other well. She says, “ We had developed a false intimacy and this became increasingly obvious after we were married.” They had differences in their character, values, and beliefs that were masked by their early sexual intimacy. Their marriage ended after five years. The affirmation in this chapter is: I will, from this day forward, save all sexual activity for marriage. Making a Fresh Start Chapter Seven is helpful for teens who have “gotten themselves on a path that is not taking them where they would like to go.” It offers hope that they can recover by making different choices and makes them aware of some of the dangers they face if they continue on the current path. Early sexual relationships outside of marriage often leave young people open to dating violence, abusive relationships, controlling behaviors, and even serious illnesses, like HIV/AIDs. The affirmation for this chapter is “I will let go of the past and live for the future.” The Big Picture In Chapter Eight of Aspire, each student is asked to revisit the goals they listed in the first chapter, narrow them down to three, and then use this to create a statement of purpose for their life. Students are asked to sequence sex, parenthood, marriage, and education goals in the order that will most likely help them to accomplish what they desire. The workbook offers statistics about choosing abstinence, academic achievement, and future income potential. The affirmation for this chapter is: I will make wise decisions now to protect my future. The final page of Aspire lists Eight Affirmations for an Excellent Life, all the affirmations from each previous chapter, and students can make a commitment by signing the page.


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