Four Principles Of Child WORDS: Victor William Harris, Ph.D. When a child is locked in the bathroom With water running And he says he is doing nothing But the dog is barking, Call 911. ~Erma Bombeck Research indicates that there must be at least a 5-to-1 positive-to-negative interaction ratio for strong couple relationships (Gottman, 1994) and at least an 8-to-1 positive-to-negative interaction ratio for strong parent-child relationships (Latham, 1994; 1999). Put simply, both verbal and non-verbal communication needs to generally be positive in our relationships. Children learn how to practice both positive and negative communication patterns by observing their parent’s relationship. Children thrive best when two committed parents who know how to communicate and negotiate con��ict effectively are present in their lives. This is why one of the best things you can do for your children and for your couple relationship is take a SMART Couples class. Learning how to steer a child toward managing his/her own behavior in healthy ways requires both knowledge and skills that facilitate positive interactions and behavior change. Children learn how to practice both positive and negative communication patterns by observing their parents’ relationship. This is why one of the best things you can do for your children and for your couple relationship is take a SMART Couples class. POSITIVE BEHAVIORAL MANAGEMENT Children generally respond much better to positive rather than negative behavioral management practices. When we use three keys to healthy parenting (i.e., to be warm, connected, and monitor children’s behaviors) they will be more likely to learn from their experiences and demonstrate appropriate behaviors (Roggman, Boyce, & Innocenti, 2008). When they misbehave or make mistakes, we want them to do so under our sphere of in��uence so they can use them as signi��cant learning opportunities (SLO’s) and so we can mentor them toward healthier choices and behaviors (Cline & Fay, 2006). Dr. Glen Latham (1994; 1999) introduced four behavioral management principles parents can use when children behave well or misbehave. FOUR BEHAVIORAL MANAGEMENT PRINCIPLES (Adapted from Latham, 1994; 1999) Principle 1: Behavior is Largely a Product of Its Immediate Environment. If a young child is misbehaving in one type of situation or environment, skilled parents often either remove the child from the environment or change the environment. When children are young, it is easier to monitor their immediate environment. For teenagers, wise parents create a home atmosphere that promotes their children’s friends wanting to “hang out” at their
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