SENIOR CONCERNS
I Thought I Would Have the
Holiday Blues By Micha James
My maternal grandmother passed away close to Easter
and, as death usually does, it created a new normal for
me. Much of my life was consumed by her in recent years
and I became extremely anxious about what the holidays
would feel like without her.
For weeks, I had rehearsed my responses to those who
may offer invitations to their homes for dinner. I prepared
my son to do something we have never done before
… eat Thanksgiving dinner at K&W. He was actually excited
about it, but I am sure it made my grandmother
turn over in her grave. She was not going to be here to
taste my desserts and tell me what she told me every
year: “Baby you did a good job. Don’t stop baking.” I was
going to be able to dress normal because she was not
going to be here to make me turn the heat up. I really just
wanted to stay home to assure I had time and space
to grieve.
As the saying goes, “If you want to make God laugh, tell
Him your plans.” I ended up at my client’s house caring
for her while her daughter visited with family. Because
those close to me know how important family is, they
were shocked to learn I chose to work. I must admit, I
was shocked myself, but I kept hearing my grandmother’s
voice singing, “Only what you do for Christ will last.”
As those words resounded, the anxiety dissipated and
energy was infused. I became excited about baking items
I only bake twice a year. I even rearranged my schedule to
make sure everything was baked ahead of time to deliver
to my son’s teachers, our family and friends.
I ultimately realized my grandmother prepared me for
such a time as this. I was raised Seventh-Day Adventist
and my family ate together EVERY Saturday after church.
Even if I did not attend church, the expectation was that
I went to “Momma’s house” to eat. Hors d’oeuvres, main
course, dessert, Russian tea and rolls, ALL HOMEMADE,
were on a fully set table every week. Guest pastors, their
families and anyone my grandmother decided to bring
home were welcomed. In fact, when my grandparents
added on to their house, they didn’t expand the living
quarters, but rather the dining area because she loved
cooking and entertaining.
I thought I would have the holiday blues, but I am thankful
for the traditions my grandmother instilled. While
she is sorely missed, a day or two out of the year will not
overpower the years of memories I have with her and the
rest of the family surrounded by food. The knowledge,
love and recipes shared around the table every Saturday
have empowered me to begin my own holiday traditions.
As I determine what those traditions are, I am reminded
and advise you also to remember, “Only what you do for
Christ will last.”
Micha James is a native of Winston-Salem and a proud
graduate of Winston-Salem State University. She is a healthcare
advocate and is passionate about servant leadership. She
has one son, Michai, who is teaching her a lot about life
through the eyes of a teenager. You can reach Micha at
michalavae@gmail.com.
December 2017 www.ForSeniorsOnlyWS.com 13