
Improvise, Adapt, Overcome
“You are not okay,” his wife sat him down and continued, “even
though you think you are. You are angry, agitated, depressed.”
He got ready to argue but was silenced by her last sentence
that stopped him in his tracks, “People are afraid of you.”
Then he remembered driving on the freeway thinking he was back in
Iraq in a Humvee, filled with the urge to ram other drivers who got too
close. His wife had to “talk him down” after he pulled over. Crowds
rattled him so he “made it a game to see how hard he could bump
people, watching them recoil in fear.” He felt sick as he realized the fear
that he had worked to overcome was still there, causing him to inspire
fear in others.
His was a fear born of childhood and an abusive stepfather. That fear
had ruled him until he discovered an out–ballet. Yes, that’s right, ballet.
He dealt with his fear by graduating with a degree in dance. He believed
he was destined for great things until his dream was shattered by the
reality that he would never have a full-time job in ballet.
For two years he bounced around until he found something totally
different. Serving in the United States Marines, he had learned to
“improvise, adapt and overcome.” He was on his way to defeating his
fears. He had felt betrayed, but now he’d show folks!
He joined the reserves, met the girl of his dreams, a ballerina, and got a
job as an advisor in a boys’ dorm. Life was good!
Then came 9/11 and his unit was deployed to Fallujah. He spent “an
incredibly tense eight months” living through heavy mortar attacks, the
constant fear of IEDs, snipers and booby traps. He hunted insurgents
at night and took care of villagers, passing out food, water, and school
supplies.
Finally, home, he married Lisa and began building his life. And then…
that conversation. “We need to talk.”
As he admitted to himself that he was not okay, Lisa asked what
would make him happy. The answer “flew out of me–I’d start a dance
company.” He did, and through that process of turning “emotion into
movement, my anger and anxiety melted away.” As he merged dance
and Marine, he had improvised, adapted and overcome.
A veteran came up after seeing his dance about his days in Fallujah
saying, “Thank you for telling people what it was like. It’s important.”
He knew his life had been guided, and he was doing what he was
meant to do–“ballet, Marine, husband and partner to Lisa. ALL OF IT
FEARLESSLY.”
Roman Baca told his story in the March 2014 Guideposts article,
“Fearless.”
If you, like Roman, are dealing with challenges holding you back, I pray
in 2020 you will realize there is One who is ever seeking to mold us and
make past and present into a beautiful expression of life. Let God do it!
It’s a New Year!
24 | January 2020 | Real Hero Report
Ensure Loved Ones Know Your
Desires for After You’re Gone
At its very essence, estate planning is exercising your right
to determine who receives your assets and handles your
responsibilities after your death or during incapacitation. The
objective is to make sure your financial and health care decisions are
carried out as you wish and that your beneficiaries receive your assets
in the most cost-effective way possible.
Your circumstances and goals are unique, and your plan should be, too.
Keep in mind that estate planning is not just for those over 50. Ensuring
that those tasked with distributing your assets are equipped to carry out
your wishes is important no matter how old you are. And it needn’t be
difficult or overly complex.
As you set out to create your plan, you will need to:
Take Inventory: Nothing is more important than knowing what you own,
whether it be tangible assets such as your house, furniture, or car, or
intangible financial assets such as checking and savings accounts, CDs,
retirement accounts, life insurance policies, etc.
Account for Your Family: Once you’ve gotten a handle on your assets,
you’ll be able to think about ways to protect them and your family. Do
you have life insurance? Is it the right type and amount of coverage?
What are your wishes for your children’s care and guardianship? A
properly drafted will is the simplest way to make your wishes known
and ensure that there is a clear plan for carrying them out in the event of
your death.
Set Directives: A good estate plan involves accounting for what might
happen before you’re gone. A medical care directive spells out your
wishes for care if you’re incapacitated. Similarly, a durable financial
power of attorney allows someone of your choosing to manage your
financial affairs. You may also choose to limit the powers of your named
representative.
Choose Beneficiaries: Investment accounts, retirement accounts, and
insurance products require you to designate to whom you wish your
assets to go and in what proportion. It’s critical to keep these beneficiary
designations current, as they supersede what’s in your will.
Be Aware of Your State’s Laws: Estate planning is almost always
viewed as a sort of federal exercise—something we engage in to ensure
that we don’t pay too much tax at the national level. But only very large
estates are subject to federal estate tax. By contrast, several states levy
taxes on smaller estates and even on those who inherit assets.
Get Professional Help: Generally, it’s worthwhile to consult a good
estate attorney. As your estate grows and your situation becomes more
complex, this can be invaluable.
Review Your Plan Regularly: Review your plan with some regularity.
As your circumstances change—the addition of a new baby, the loss of
a loved one, a change in jobs, a spouse’s career transition, a growing
inventory of assets—so should your plan. Even if your situation doesn’t
change, estate laws do.