1 1 HOW CAN OTHER PARENTS AND FAMILY MEMBERS GET INVOLVED AT UNC CHARLOTTE? “I recommend parents access the website. And for locals, take advantage of the family events planned through the University. If they have flexible schedules, they should avail themselves of the family programs. The University offers these because they have the experience to know they are important. They want the parents and family members to feel connected to the University and their children.” WHAT DOES BEING PART OF THE NINER NATION FAMILY MEAN TO YOU? “It means that we have children who are succeeding and will do great things because of their presence in the Niner Nation Family.” HOW DO YOU STAY CONNECTED WITH UNC CHARLOTTE? “Being that we’re out-of-state parents, we use the website. I check in with what’s happening on campus with events and opportunities. I also have consistent conversations with my children about what and how they’re doing.” HOW HAS YOUR PARENTING STYLE EVOLVED SINCE YOUR STUDENT BEGAN HIS/ HER TIME AT UNC CHARLOTTE? “I have to laugh at that question because they did cover this in the parent program: gradual release and letting your children grow up, mature and discover on their own. I remember very clearly the conversation during orientation about how to empower your student to selfadvocate; how to release them to do things by themselves. Maturity: this is what it’s all about. We are now the counselors. Josh and Rebecca now seek our advice. We like that our children enjoy spending time with us and seek our counsel. They like to run things by us and ask, ‘what do you think of this?’ We’ve become consultants.” WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE ASPECT OF UNC CHARLOTTE? “The heart of the school changes lives of the students who attend and that’s my favorite thing. We’re happy parents! We’re so thrilled our children love UNC Charlotte. They were led by God to attend UNC Charlotte and we’re immensely blessed that they’re there!” ANY ADVICE FOR OTHER UNC CHARLOTTE PARENT AND FAMILY MEMBERS? “Be supportive, but don’t helicopter. It can be toxic. They’re trying to make their way and be autonomous. It’s important for their growth process to be able to release them and to trust what you’ve instilled in them as parents. If they fail, be there to help pick them up and encourage them to keep going. Helicoptering can be problematic. They’re not babies anymore. You still have visions of that baby you held or that six-year-old learning to ride a bike. You see this montage of their lives, but they’re now young adults who need to learn how to live on their own. Communication helps. Modern technology makes it possible and FaceTime is great. You can talk with them on the way to class and see their path around school, see what the weather is like, see your children smiling. I get this opportunity with my children because of technology. Give them space because they’re young adults. Sometimes you have to keep your mouth closed. Sometimes you shouldn’t say anything, but be there to listen. Be connected to your children, but not by helicoptering. When they’re having difficulties, we can no longer fight their battles. It’s important to let them have their voice and discover who they are.” UNC CHARLOTTE | SOPHOMORE YEAR
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