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ASK DR. SHARON
doctorotis@nextgenmagazine.org
A Strong Couple Makes
For Happy Kids…
What can we do as parents to strengthen our relationship with each other?
-GM, Palmetto
I am so glad you are making your
marriage a priority. Children need to
come from a parent–centered model,
not child-centered parenting, in order to
become emotionally healthy adults. The
best thing a father can do for his child is
to love their mother and vice versa. No
amount of toys and gifts will make up for
that need in a child’s development.
The latest book I am reading, ust
Your Type, written by Christa Hardin,
addresses the need to individually
address past traumas. Unresolved
traumas may inuence your reactions
with your spouse. There is no time in this
column to address what that means so
I will tackle the more practical aspects
mentioned in the book
Know your type…
Take a free quiz online. Myers-Briggs
type, Enneagram, or Melancholy/Sanguine
personality tests are fun. Guess what your
spouse is like in their traits of personality.
Usually opposites attract, marriages
attack. We are often attracted to our
opposite but mad when they are our
opposite. Learn your type and accept your
opposites. It would be boring if we married
just little clones of ourselves. It is great to
know how to meet each other’s need. We
are each born with unique gifts so focus
on those and not on the trait that drives us
crazy. Accept what you cannot change
What part of the brain
is dominant?
If you are in an opposite sex relationship,
your brains are wired differently. In
general males are more physical and
show affection by wresting with each
other. They can be more aggressive and
look into more physical features when
picking a mate. They are logical and
more “x it” by nature. The female brain
is better at multitasking but women are
more prone to depression and emotional
distress. They have a better memory
and can recall what goes wrong in
the relationship.
Never stop dating….
Never stop enjoying each other. By
making dating a must, you are putting
communication as a top priority. You
cannot talk about problems or frustrations,
or the kids while, on these dates. Wow,
what are you going to talk about? Try
open ended questions. People always
think expensive when I say go on a date.
Quite the opposite.
Turn off the electronics, lay down a
blanket in the family room, and bring
out some snacks. Play a board game
or just ask questions of each other. We
live in Florida with incredible sunsets.
Pick up a snack and watch the sky light
up at sunset. Tourists spend millions of
dollars each year on our sunsets and
many of us forget to enjoy what we have
on our doorstep. I love the different birds
in our parks during this time or even the
morning sunrise.
Think coffee or lunch. Meals are cheaper
and just as fun. There are many free
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