According to the
dictionary, the adjective
“estranged” means a loss
of affection, a turning away
from someone. The word
“strange” within it seems
to suggest an alienation of
affection—that a loving
relationship has not only
soured but also turned distant
and even somewhat hostile. My
father recently passed away. Neither I nor my two
siblings had seen him in 25 years. About eight
years ago, I reached out to him to tell him that I
was all right and that I forgave him. I showed him
pictures of his grandchildren. We did not have
contact since that day.
My father was a well-known musician in the
very small community where he had lived for the
last thirty years or more. He had been living alone
in a hotel room at the benevolence of the hotel
owner. The police detective who was called to
the hotel after his death searched his belongings
and asked those who knew him about his next of
kin. The only thing people seemed to know about
him were stories that he shared during music sets.
Those stories did not include anything about his
family. We learned of his death from a Facebook
post shared to a community page, days after his
of information about what he had been doing the
with questions about his next of kin. Nobody in
the community seemed to have any idea about his
history. One friend said that he had two children,
but they were estranged from him.
It is amazing how much I have I thought of
the word “estranged” in the past couple of weeks.
I have felt both defensive and contemplative.
I was not the one to cause the estranged
relationship. What was my responsibility to
further reach out and seek a relationship with
someone who did not seek to have one with me?
The Bible says in Malachi 4:6, NASB: “He will
restore the hearts of the fathers to their children
and the hearts of the children to their fathers,
so that I will not come and smite the land with
a curse.” As I am writing this, it feels that we are
living out this Old Testament prophesy. Some
of the social ills plaguing our society have what
is called a “father factor” to them, meaning the
absence of a father has been shown to be a
contributor. The Malachi Bible verse says it is the
12 Bham Family July 2020
JUST FOR DADS
The only thing people seemed to know
about him were stories that he shared
during music sets. Those stories did not
include anything about his family. We
learned of his death from a Facebook
post shared to a community page, days
after his death. Facebook posts and
what he had been doing the past twenty-
responsibility of both the father and the child to
turn to one another to avoid a curse in the land. I
pray you are able to safely reconcile relationships
with a parent or child in your life that are
estranged. There will be a day when it is too late.
I pray that restoration of relationships happens
today and that our land is healed.
Ward Williams is the founder and executive director of
Vineyard Family Services. Contact him at ward@vfsdads.com.
Ward
Williams
How Chamber membership
works for me.
“Shelby County is a great place to live and do business, and The Shelby
County Chamber is one of the big reasons why this is true! Our business
has experienced consistent growth as we have taken advantage of the
numerous business networking opportunities that are available. We
appreciate the partnership between
the Chamber, the County and all of our
municipalities spelled out in “ShelbyOne
strategic plan. When you also recognize
development and support, career
readiness and all the ways in which it
understand why I believe the future here
is so bright!
Ken Sawyer, CEO, Sawyer Solutions
(844) 448-7767 • sawyersolutionsllc.com
To learn how your business can
Chris Williams at (205) 663-
4542, ext. 103, or
chris@shelbychamber.org.
/sawyersolutionsllc.com
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