By The Grinch By Jem
You know Dasher, and Dancer and Prancer, and Vixen. You know
Comet, and Cupid, and Donner, and Blitzen, but do you recall, the
last time any of them asked about you or how you’re doing? No? I
didn’t think so.
I’m (not) dreaming of a White Christmas. I’m from the North, I’ve
done the white Christmas. You know what they don’t tell you? It
only snows when it’s cold.
I don’t want a lot for Christmas, there is just one thing I need; Ryan
Reynolds.
Chestnuts roasting on an open fire… Really? You know what I’m
craving? Hot nuts - said no one ever.
It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas. No it’s not. It looks like a
bunch of palm trees awkwardly draped in holiday lights.
Frosty the Snow Man? More like Frosty my beer mug. Keep this
thing full if I’m going to survive the holidays.
Santa Baby, hurry down my bathroom ceiling exhaust fan tonight.
Feliz Navi-Don’t.
He’s making his list, he’s checking it twice, he’s gonna find out
who’s naughty and hopefully give me their number.
We wish you a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year! Let’s hope
it’s a good one, no more hurricanes!
You will get a sentimental feeling, when you hear voices singing
let’s be Jolly, go to Agave and get a tamale.
It’s the most wonderful time for a beer!
Silver bells, silver bells, its Christmas what a pity. Ring-a-ling, hear
them ring, thank God it ends Christmas Day.
18 TYBEE BEACHCOMBER | DEC 2017
I have a granddaughter that loves Christmas with all her being.
September sends her into the mode, her heart singing.
She knows her grandma Neen loves the holidays too...
But I was stunned to see holiday lights and tree in her room so
soon.
There is a bucket list at least a mile long, I believe,
Of all things to be done before Christmas Eve.
She watches every Christmas movie that was ever done.
Not to mention every Christmas cookie and desserts to be made
all in good fun.
Pinterest is her go to site for all the latest stuff.
Making things for friends or spots the perfect hat and muff.
Mom and Dad roll their eyes at all the energy spent.
And soon join in as her spirit in Christmas can’t be bent.
Before you know it, the list is all said and done.
She’s ready for Christmas, bar none.
Brother comes home from college to join in.
As well as family to share the time and add to the din.
All go to church, as we know in our hearts what Christmas is
about.
Kindness, peace, and sharing with others that may have doubt.
We don silly Christmas hats, take pictures, laugh and giggle.
Did someone find the Christmas pickle?
The family feast has begun,
With eating, chattering and tales, yet to be spun.
It is over too soon, with happy memories all built in,
Thank you to someone who loves Christmas, where life begins.
Merry Christmas!
Alas, it’s that time of year, to cram Christmas down our throats.
Force one another to be “Merry” when all I want is to be left alone. The
older I get the more I relate with Ebenezer Scrooge. I’m not interested
in spending time with friends or family, and I’m certainly not a fan
of judgmental ghosts telling me how to live my life, regardless of
how quickly they can visit me in my sleep. It’s my rant, and I’ve got
Christmas songs on my mind, so sit down, shut up, and let me get
through this.
WHEN SOMEONE
LOVES CHRISTMAS
CHRISTMAS SONGS