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Imagine if being sent to the corner, or to time out, was less of a
punishment and more of a therapeutic experience that included
items meant to calm the senses and regulate emotions.
“When children start crying uncontrollably because they don’t
get their way, the most primitive part of their brain is taking over
and preventing them from making rational decisions,” said Marina
Bunch, Clinical Director of Outpatient Mental Health Services at the
Florida Center for Early Childhood. “Children need support from their
caregivers and the environment in order to learn how to regulate their
emotions just as they need support to learn how to speak or walk.”
Bunch and her team of early childhood mental health experts
created calming boxes to give to their young clients when they are
feeling upset and recommend that parents do the same in order to
incorporate self-regulation into their child’s everyday routine.
can ease anxiety and teach children to rely on their senses in order
to regulate their emotions and avoid, or recover from, an outburst.
“A calming box should have at least one item for each sense,” said
Tara Motzenbecker, a licensed school pychologist. “It should be a
special box that kids don’t normally have access to. It’s not a toy,
it’s something special for when they are very upset.”
If a child has an episode, parents can send them to a quiet,
comfortable place in the house and give them the calming box to
use to settle down. If the child is not able to calm themselves on
their own, Bunch recommends the parent sitting with them and
showing them how to use the box until they develop the capacity
themselves. The process is not meant to be a punishment, but a
tool to help regulate their emotions.
Motzenbecker said parents don’t have to spend a lot of money to
buy a calming box, in fact, most of the items inside are things they
probably already have at home or can create easily with household
items. She recommended parents do the following:
• Create the calming box itself. Before you start collecting calming
contents, you will need something to contain them. Motzenbecker
said children are more likely to treat the box as something special
if they decorate it themselves, painting it with their favorite color or
adorning it with pictures of things that make them feel good.
WORDS: Merab-Michal Favorite