LOVE, NOT ACTUALLY
A Love Advice Column by a Boy and a Girl Who Should Not Be Giving Love Advice. Ever.
Patriot Day - 9-11: A Day to Remember
By Margie McLellan
TYBEE BEACHCOMBER | SEPT 2020 35
The Question this month is: Do you take back a cheater?
Girls Advice:
No. Once a cheater, always a cheater. I don’t care what promises of fidelity come back at me. Your ass is out and I’m keeping the good pots and pans, not that I
will use them, but it will piss you off and any petty thing I can do to make your life miserable, I’m gonna do it. How dare you?! Ugh. I’m out and so are you. Suck it
and die. If I get an STD I’m coming after you with a pitchfork and submerging your body in a crab pot in the Back River. Ass.
Boy’s Advice:
My counterpart sure has some strong feelings about this topic. Guess she’s been burned before, and by the sounds of it, more than once. I feel her though. If
you’ve never been cheated on, you can’t even come close to imagining the pain that it can cause in most cases. There was this one time I was cheated on and the
first thing that popped into my head when I found out was her best friend that had been flirting with me for years.
I can tell you this, there’s nothing more gratifying than revenge sex. I’m not saying it’s ok to turn into a person of ill repute once you get cheated on. I’m just saying
that one felt pretty damn good. People are people, they can change, life moves on, but for god’s sake, leave the cheaters behind.
This topic reminds me of a guy I once knew from Ohio. He walked into his house with a sheep under his arm. He walked up to his wife, raised the sheep in front
of her and exclaimed, “This is the pig I’ve been cheating on you with!” His wife looked at him with a confused look on her face and said, “But honey, that’s not a
pig.” The husband replied to his wife, “I wasn’t talking to you.”
PSA: If you find yourself in a position where you’ve been cheated on and want to relieve all that stress with a revenge session, we can be reached at C/O Boy’s Advice
or C/O Girl’s Advice, info@tybeebeachcomber.com.
I’m sure most every one of us remember where we were on that fateful day, September 11, 2001. Watching the Twin Towers fall in New York City, along with the
Pentagon being hit, and Flight 93 going down, was one of the most tragic things most of us remember in our lives. It was truly devastating beyond words.
But out of that tragedy, something amazing happened. Our country came together as never before. From the heroic firefighters who gave their lives saving people
in the Twin Towers, to the brave passengers on Flight 93, that kept the plane they were on from hitting the White House, to untold heroes who also stepped up, the
country watched all of this unfold on TV and we all mourned together. We were so filled with a sense of patriotism. It didn’t matter what part of the country we were
from, we all came together, strong in our patriotism.
Yes, Patriotism ran high. Flags were flown from every house, building, places of business, even cars. We were proud Americans, determined to overcome this
tragedy together.
Many young men stepped up to do their duty to God and Country by joining the Military. Many gave their lives to protect our freedom. The government came
together, crossing party lines, to ensure that our safety would be protected from this ever happening again.
Yes, it was truly a coming together as a nation.
Now here we are, almost twenty years later. Many younger Americans weren’t even alive or were too young to remember. Many of us who do remember seem
to have lost the patriotism we felt from that day. We are so split down party lines now, that we can’t even hold decent conversations with those we disagree with.
Patriot Day is a good way to reunite our country. It is a national day of prayer and remembrance for the 3,000 people we lost to the terror attacks that day. It is a day
to strengthen our resolve to stand together as one nation, one people. A day to remember that we should all regain our sense of patriotism and pride in our country.
And it is a day we should never forget.
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