Observing John more closely over a period
of time greatly assisted Lobana in developing
a new approach for him. For one thing,
she became calmer and exhibited more positive
feelings. Then one day, she had an inspiration.
She gave him the chalkboard in
order to teach him how to write his numbers.
John greatly enjoyed the activity. From then
Humility was the key, she decided. From that moment on,
Lobana could feel herself growing from within. Making a
decision to cultivate more empathy, compassion, and love…
on, every morning, the first thing that John
did was to bring the chalkboard to Lobana
and ask with excitement, “What is next?” He
continued doing so until he had mastered all
his numbers. Afterwards, Lobana gave him
a little booklet to write his numbers in. He
was so overjoyed that he went all around
the classroom, showing everybody his new
booklet. It was apparent that John had established
trust for Lobana, as well as a deepening
bond. After completing his numbers,
Lobana introduced the letters. At the same
time, John began to choose other challenging
lessons and worked harmoniously with
other children.
Lobana was confident that these changes occurred
within John because she invited him
to work with her in a kind, loving manner.
He reacted more constructively to her efforts.
One cannot explain the meaning of love;
however, one can see its effects. John went
from saying “No!” to everything to experiencing
the joy of learning. His concentration
and delight brought hope to Lobana’s heart.
The other teachers on the team also modified
their behavior towards him. “Everything
is possible when you send love to children!”
Lobana explained to them. The other teachers
commenced sitting and connecting with
him instead of judging him from a distance.
They, too, started to understand John’s behavior.
Lobana’s heart blossomed. “The love
of your heart can be a bridge from where the
child is now to becoming a peaceful child,”
she concluded.
Love and the Teacher
This transformation of love in Lobana's
heart greatly assisted her in another situation,
where she had to resolve a difficult
situation with another Montessori lead
teacher, Mary. Mary would become angry
with her assistants instead of patiently requesting
and modeling what she wanted.
She had an overbearing approach with them
and talked to them with disdain. Additionally,
Mary did not help them in performing
many of the mundane classroom duties with
the children. They were losing respect for
her. The assistants began going to Lobana
in desperation to complain about how Mary
was
treating them.
Since resolving classroom dilemmas was
part of Lobana’s responsibilities, she decided
to approach Mary by inviting her to a meeting.
The first thing Mary exclaimed when
Lobana called her for a meeting was, “Am I
in trouble?” “Did anybody complain to you?”
“I want to talk to you, as well!” Lobana noted
that Mary was exhibiting a position of fight
or flight. At that point, Lobana knew that
she had to send love to Mary and have empathy.
Lobana smiled and told her in a gentle
voice: “I’m here to listen to you.”
Filling her heart with love prevented Lobana
from being judgmental with Mary. Lobana
looked at her in the eye in a caring way, instead
of being angry, and began to listen.
She decided that she would not tell Mary at
this point what her assistants had protested
about. Mary started to indirectly talk about
her assistants and her problems in the classroom.
Lobana asked questions and inquired
about the details. Above all things, Lobana
desired for them to come up with peaceful
solutions together. Slowly, Mary, in turn,
listened thoughtfully to what Lobana had
to say about areas where she needed to improve.
Happily, Mary was attentive and open
to change. She indicated that she was willing
to heed the points that Lobana was advising
her to take.
Together, they came up with a workable plan
that included the steps that Mary would
take in order for her to collaborate harmoniously
with her assistants. Later that evening,
Lobana received a text from Mary that
said, “I do appreciate your kindness!” Lobana
knew in her heart that she had made a
positive influence on Mary’s thinking. Gradually,
Mary put a considerable amount of
effort into becoming a better teacher to serve
the children and her team. Developing more
kindness, she began to rely on Lobana for effective
ideas that would improve her classroom.
Mary acknowledged appreciation for
the help she was receiving as being part of
Lobana’s “wisdom.”
What do we take away from these two stories?
First, love is the fundamental aspect
of solving classroom (and home) difficulties.
With love, one builds trust and a sense
of safety and calmness. When children and
teachers are worried about being judged, they
feel scared and are not open to being part of
the solution. An important message is that
we all make mistakes, and we can learn from
them. Being humble and patient will resolve
many complicated issues in the classroom.
This is howe teachers implement Montessori’s
wise words about peace and unity.
Christine Lapierre, PhD. Christine is
a MACTE-credentialed Early Childhood
teacher. She has a PhD in adult learning
and is an instructor and educator. She
is passionate about bringing peace to
the world. She lives in Calgary, Alberta,
Canada.
Lobana Alabbas is a Montessori
Early Childhood Teacher from London
Montessori Center, as well as a certified
Arabic language teacher. She is
passionate about teaching children how
to enjoy and love learning. She also
lives in Calgary, Alberta, Canada.
References
Montessori, M. (1972). The secret of
childhood. New York, NY: Random
House Publishing Group.
Montessori, M. (1995). The absorbent
mind. New York, NY: Holt Paperbacks.
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