Hiding the Evidence
For regular readers of “Everything
Brevard,” you have followed me on a
fascinating journey through time. After
retiring as a juvenile judge, I made
daily visits to grade school and sat in
as a student from grades one through
happens during those 12 years to lead
some youngsters into juvenile court.
It was a fascinating opportunity.
This last article finds me in high school where
kids experience the
problematic teen years.
Later curfews, greater
independence, drugs, and
hormones blend into a
dangerous concoction.
For example, my
“classmates” estimated
that 80% of them used
marijuana by the 8th
grade. And all of them
knew to use Visine to
remove that telltale
redness in their eyes
following a quick puff.
On the other hand, only
about 25% of parents seem
to know the trick — as it
relates to drug use.
How do they explain
regular Visine use to
their parents? “Sleepless
nights of studying hard.”
It’s what parents want
to hear, love to hear.
But, they told me, its
true purpose is to “erase
evidence and keep
parents off their backs.”
Evidence? Did I hear a
familiar word? Yes, and it
led me to the key insight
of my scholarly journey.
I had long since realized
that 50% of the kids who
appeared before me in
court had an inexplicable
personality trait that
put them there. I finally
realized that the other
50% were there because
their parents failed to
closely examine the years
of accumulating evidence
that the child was doing
wrong and was bound to
be caught — by someone
else, most likely the police.
Those parents lacked
the skill, motivation,
or time to do some
judging for themselves.
They accepted bland
explanations. They
backed down when the
tears came out or the
defensive yelling began.
They failed to fulfill their
role as judge and jury.
Instead, they took the
easy way and waited until
I had to do it.
That was the key to my
journey. Parents must
detect the clues and
determine if the clues are
evidence of a pattern of
improper conduct. From
an early age, kids are
skilled at letting you see
the side of them that lets
you believe they are the
fulfillment of your dreams.
However, many of them
go about doing what they
want to do. They lived a
bifurcated life.
So, parents, learn how
to recognize evidence of
potential bad behavior
and scrutinize its
probative value. Our
libraries and online
sources have hundreds
of items available for
parents of all aged
children. There are audio
programs you can listen
to in your car or when
doing chores.
Kids don’t self-assemble
into responsible adults.
You must be ready with
the right tools at the
right time.
Larry Johnston grew up in Brevard County, where his
family lived on a boat during his high school years.
He has held a Merchant Marine captain’s license
and flight instructor and airline transport pilot rating.
He retired after 17 years as a circuit judge and now
writes and travels throughout the U.S. gathering
material with his wife in their motorhome. He can be
reached at LarryJohnstonFL@aol.com.
EVERYTHING family
Teenagers:
052 // EVERYTHINGBREVARD.com
/EVERYTHINGBREVARD.com
link