By Hollie Sessoms
A Tribute to Fathers
Can you successfully parent a child without a father?
Of course! Millions of women have done it. Millions of women have slugged
through the trenches of parenthood all alone, playing disciplinarian, hug-giver,
rule maker, schedule keeper, boo-boo kisser, and bread winner all at once.
And many of them have raised successful children who go on to become
responsible adults. It’s an amazing and admirable feat to raise a child alone.
You can do it, but why would you want to if given the choice?
Men, and by extension, fathers, seem to get the short shrift in this day.
Masculinity is toxic, men are trying to suppress women, the patriarchy is
domineering.
Believe all that if you will, but I’ll choose to believe in the beauty of masculinity.
The beauty of strength, courage, independence, integrity. It was my dad who
taught me to take chances. It was my dad who taught me how to stand on my
own. It was my dad who taught me that family comes first and the importance
of education, the honor of service to something greater than yourself. It was
my dad who taught, no begged, me to check my oil before leaving on any drive
over 30 miles (what in the world did he think was going to happen to all the
oil?).
How could anyone label this as toxic?
Fathers play such an important role in the lives of their children. Mothers
typically want to shield their kids, protect them from all the evils of the world,
but fathers are the ones who want to prepare their kids for the world, give
them all the weapons and armor they will need when they’re out on their own.
Mothers typically want to nurture, whereas fathers want to strengthen. Mothers
buckle the helmets and elbow pads while fathers throw the children in the air.
It’s a beautiful dance when it’s done in rhythm with trust and appreciation for
how different and important everyone’s separate roles are.
It’s easy having a father. It’s easy to know that someone will always be there
if you need them, having a safety net in life. Knowing that someone believes
in you and loves you unconditionally. It’s harder (I would imagine) to father
someone. To have to be that pillar of strength. To have to hold entire worlds
and lives on your very shoulders and sacrifice what you might have been for
another person.
Let’s remember that sacrifice that fathers have made for their children. And if
you weren’t lucky enough to have such a role model in your own life, remember
that it’s never too late to be that role model for someone else.
18 TYBEE BEACHCOMBER | JUNE 2019
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