The P ublisher Po stulates
I have always been fascinated by those
people I consider to be my friends.
Early in life, proximity was the most
important element. It was simply an
easy thing to do. Classmates, neighbors
and relatives filled most of the spots.
However, as I grew older (I say “older”
rather than “matured,” as I am not sure that
has ever occurred), I have noticed that most
of my friends are people I feel are far
more accomplished, learned, successful or
lovable than myself. Therefore, I certainly
understand why I have chosen them as
friends. But the glaring question is why do
they reciprocate and they must, because
friendship is a two-way street, and it is
most difficult to be friends if both parties
are not similarly inclined.
This has led me to a philosophy of
thought that says, “To have a friend,
you must be a friend.” That is an easy
concept to say, but it is difficult to define.
In addition to supporting you in your
endeavors, friends must also call you on
your follies and not let you get off track
if they can help it. Friends should be
more than someone you know and like.
To be friends, you must care about them
and admire them and want to emulate
them. Respect and trust are obvious
requirements. To me, the term friend
is the highest compliment I can bestow
on anyone, as it implies that I know the
person well and that I like them anyway.
To some, a friend in need can be a
problem. To me, a friend in need is an
opportunity to express how important
our friendship is. I believe friends can
talk to each other openly, unguardedly,
and know that whatever is said will
be kept confidential. Openness should
always exist between friends, yet a
friend’s role is sometimes just to sit and
listen. At other times, it requires that
34 TAMPA BAY MAGAZINE | SEPTEMBER/OCTOBER 2019
friends express their views, even if they
are contrary to what is being shared.
With a friend, you can be yourself.
A friend knows you and cares for you
anyway. If you are lucky, a friend will
not notice your failings. When the rest
of the world walks out, a friend walks
in and will even co-sign a loan for you,
even though that is the easiest way to
lose a friend. Ultimately, friendships
are like money in the bank. You should
never take out more than you deposit.
So here’s to my friends. I do not deserve
them; but I am blessed to have them. 9
Publisher / Editor
FRIENDSHIP
By Aaron R. Fodiman
I can sit comfortably with good friends without feeling the need to engage them in conversation.
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