The P ublisher Po stulates
Beyond Serenity
24 TAMPA BAY MAGAZINE
Sometimes I don’t care if I can’t change things, but most of the time
I want to be able to change them, even if I know I can’t.
| JANUARY/FEBRUARY 2017
GRAM
Publisher / Editor
By Aaron R. Fodiman
For most of my life, I have attempted to follow the advice
of the Serenity Prayer to accept the things I cannot
change and to change the things that I can, while
pretending that I can tell one from the other. As life
goes on, I am finding that there are fewer and fewer things
I am able to change, other than myself. So I now spend most
of my time examining myself to determine what I should
change and what I should accept. I have learned that anger
and revenge get me nowhere and that when someone does
something displeasing, it makes no difference what the facts
are. It is best to move forward without assigning blame or
rethinking what could have been done to avoid the situation.
As there is no sense in working to “put the cork back in the
bottle” once all the liquid is gone.
The wisdom I once relied upon to help me know what
I could change and what I had to accept seems to have
shifted from a position of me being the master of my own
destiny to being a believer in fate and predestination
in many areas. I credit much of this to laziness, since many
times I perceive that the results that I could achieve would
probably not be worth the effort. Fortunately, I am now
much more willing to take responsibility for changing
myself. I have come to realize that as much as I may
complain about how hard it is to eat healthy, it isn’t that
difficult if I really want to do it. Therefore, I am evaluating
which of my many habits, choices or whatever you choose
to call them, needs to be altered or eliminated. This is not
an easy task, as I find that anything I honestly want to do,
I can. Exercise, as distasteful as it is for me, is my choice,
even though all I can think about when I hear the word
exercise is “extra fries.”
In the past, serenity has meant accepting that which
I cannot change and trying to change that which I can control
by being wise enough to be able to discern one from the other.
However, since I am currently more disposed to believing
that the only thing I have power over is myself, that’s the
thing I’m trying to change. I should have figured that out a
long time ago, but it takes awhile for me to get things right,
especially since I always thought I knew what was right
from the beginning. Are you still thinking you can change
things that can’t be changed? I am not. 9