I understand that they don’t know about wearing knickers,
spats or white bucks, and I forget that they have no sense of
what it means to sound like a broken record. If I tell them
everything is “swell,” it’s as meaningless as referring to the
old radio and television program when I say, “I’m living the
life of Riley.”
Edwin Land thought he had changed photography forever
with his Polaroid cameras that used film that didn’t use a
negative, not that anyone remembers what a negative is
anymore now that everything is digital. Film negatives
are another forgotten term.
I have no idea what to call hairstyles, as I no longer
see a beehive or a D.A. (ducktail like Elvis) like I did
when I was their age. I wonder if they have ever tried
to remember what a “whatchamacallit” is. There are so
many words and phrases I know that they have probably
never heard. I find myself wondering if I am as clueless
about some of the words and phrases that they use to
communicate with each other. I have finally figured out
what “hooking up” means, even though we had a wide
variety of different phrases for that such as “scoring” or
at least getting to “second base.”
Cassettes and floppy disks are some of my high-tech
terms that confuse the younger set. I don’t think of myself
as outmoded, but obviously I am, as many words that I
have used to communicate with others during my lifetime
have become antiquated or simply undergone a verbal
change, such as sneakers, dungarees and pedal pushers
(tennis shoes, jeans, capri pants). My guess is that if I
said, “Four on the floor,” even young car buffs might
think of a fraternity party, rather than a transmission
term. Which reminds me that most of today’s youth have
never drunk fruity “purple passion,” while I don’t know what
a “growler” is (craft beer container).
I am the only person I know who has a Rolodex on his desk
for organizing phone numbers. How about maps? Do they still
sell them? If they do, can I get them for green stamps? I fear
that I am becoming obsolete. Now isn’t that a fine kettle of fish?
Maybe it is just as well that I don’t understand this new
generation and that they don’t understand me. But I’ll have
the last laugh in 50 years when the next generation has no
idea what the internet was and wonders what in the word
was a Facebook.
I’m not myself today and everybody has noticed the improvement 87