FEATURE
This is too much! How will this ever change?
What do I do? Why do I let this bother me so much?
I can’t do this!
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All of us, yes, all of us, at one time or another, have
found ourselves making these statements or asking
these questions. Recent studies indicate that
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rience symptoms of anxiety. These numbing and joy
stealing emotions do not discriminate against the
daughters of the High King either. Whether in the
driveway of an anticipated breakup, doorway of a
job interview, or parking lot of a college exam, that
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ning and our soul searching is very real!
These feelings were all too real for Graysen when
she was met with the many adversities involved in
the transition from high school to college. Kneedeep
in the changes of life, Graysen found herself
swimming in a sea of anxiety.
For a moment, let’s take a walk in her shoes.
“When I was in high school, volleyball was my outlet.
It was a place where I could transform into this
strong powerful girl who could say anything and do
anything. For years, I focused on being the best version
of an athlete I could possibly be. Everyday was
a routine, with the same people, the same place, and
the same activities.
Then one day I graduated from high school and everything
changed.
Something many people don’t know about me is
person who literally could not be cracked. While
all my friends were applying to huge universities,
I told myself that I wasn’t smart enough to attend
anywhere other than a technical college. I told myself
that I wasn’t strong enough, tall enough, or fast
enough to play college volleyball. I told myself I
wasn’t smart enough to apply and get into any university,
so I didn’t. I didn’t apply to one single uni-
because I thought it was all I could do.
BE VIVACIOUS | BEVIVACIOUS.ORG
Throughout my two years at tech, I failed class after
class. I was unprepared and not willing to learn. I
spent all my time doing stuff I thought I was sup-
my time was spent skipping class, going out every
night, spending money on unnecessary things, and
going back and forth from this boyfriend to that
boyfriend.
To me, it felt like my life was falling apart. I lost a
life long friend, other friends that I’d made during
college, and I felt like my family hated me. Although
looking back now I see it as a dramatic interpretation,
I’m embarrassed to admit that I actually believed
my life was “hell.” In the depths of my anxiety,
I even thought of dying, and how much easier it
would be if I wasn’t here anymore. Even today, it is
hard for me to admit that I ever had thoughts of suicide.
I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life.
Each day I called out to God. Each day I believed He
left me with no response. I did my devotional every
day, I went to a Christian based therapist (once) and
all the while I was still pretty depressed.
The change entered my life again, but this time it
was a shift that would ultimately bring about transformation.
Out of the blue, my mom found a life
coach out of Hemingway, S.C., named Robin Lewis.
two for Christian based life- coaching. The best decision
of my life! Throughout my time with her, I’d
lost friends and gained new ones. I had broken up
to going to Coastal Carolina University!
many valuable lessons:
that if I met the right guy THEN my life would
change for the better. Turns out, change doesn’t happen
until YOU MAKE IT HAPPEN. I learned that
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